At home with Little Leilua

This is our day in a picture.  Life with Eli Leilua is spent a lot at home.  A lot of holding him, a lot of movies, a lot of juggling, prioritizing, and wishing for more hands.  Really.  Octopuses are probably great moms.  Things are beginning to normalize again, our days and weeks getting better and more predictable.  This boy gets a lot of loving from all four of us everyday.  His sisters are his biggest fans, his little mothers, and his best friends.

(sorry some of the pictures are sideways)

from the very beginning they both rush over when he's crying and start singing to him, "Lullaby, lullaby, go to sleep little brother...."  Every time.  without fail.  it's very sweet.

one week old with his handsome daddy

Here is a journal entry I wrote a few days after he was born:

(sentimental, emotional, sappy, corny, lovey dovey alert.  that's just who i am!)

"i'm sitting here holding my 5 day old baby boy.  i've been holding him constantly and yet i still feel so sad to put him down.  i can't believe how much i love him.  i love him.  a love that feels so full when i take time to reflect on it and push everything else aside, out of my mind.  he, his tiny little newborn self, makes me feel again that this is what i'm meant to do with my life.  be a mother.  to my two daughters and my son.  

this recovery has been the most difficult so far.  menieres and migraines acting up, emotions extra stirred up because of other circumstances surrounding his birth, more intense cramping with it being my third, among other things.  tiredness and worry.  but this boy and his sweetest of all sweet temperaments is the light through it all.  i am loving and cherishing this newborn stage with him which i didn't expect so much.  because newborns are just hard.  i look so forward to the day when i am back to my normal self and thriving as i take care of the three of them helping them thrive, teaching and playing with them, feeding them well, and making a happy home for them.  but while i'm not able to do all the things i want to do and while i try my hardest not to let myself crash down in despair and depression- i will ever be grateful to Heavenly Father for this specific little boy He has sent to me at this particular time.  he is sweet, he is patient, he is loving, he is peaceful and brings peacefulness to me and to our whole house.  i'm tearful with this love i feel for him."

hannah singing to him again.  "Lullaby, lullaby......"

auntie chio and family came to visit!  he's the best dressed kid in all of utah, mainly because of her!

my birthday celebration this year!  my three kids, my mom, cupcakes, and a sun-shining backyard.  i missed andrew, who was at hyrum and j's wedding in virginia.  but it was still a great day.

i love a cute naked baby!

the best birthday gift

i love these father son moments.  they're best buddies.

my three favorites

watching Leilua Lualemaga (eli's namesake) at home opening his mission call!  eli will always know who he's named after.

meeting uncle matt and aunt cassie!

meeting the bennings for the second time

his first of many hikes.  eli and i cut it short while the others kept going a little ways.

this is how we eat dinner lately, with him asleep in one of our arms.  cause if we put him down he wakes up.

my two boys

his cute sulley bath towel proudly chosen by the girls with grandma dobbins!

this little outfit is special to our family because it's the first thing we ran out and bought when we first found out we were pregnant.  sadly that pregnancy resulted in a miscarriage.  each of our kids has worn this outfit and it has always meant a lot to us, now as a sweet memory of that first baby.

he hated the hat.  but i thought it was too cute not to take a picture!

LOVING my baby wrap! out and about AND around the house.  i love having him so close and being hands free.

i love watching these relationships

i asked audrey to "babysit" while i was working in the kitchen

when i came back out i found this cuteness

she was born to be a big sister.  she's always bursting with love for him and looking for ways to help take are of him any way she can.

this was probably our first family picture with all of us.  outing to an art festival on audrey's birthday.  all of our birthdays were pretty low key this year, but i don't think any of us minded too much. 

hannah has a lovely bandaid on her head from  a little "playing too much incident" with audrey

meeting his first boy cousin, thomas!

while we were doing this (and calling hannah to come be in the picture)

she was doing this and saying no.  that's our hannah.

in the end we got her in the picture

his little surprised/bewildered face

the only toy in the house that is all his!  is this not the cutest picture ever???

his once says MISTER CHARMING

he is so used to these two little faces being in his face all the time.  it's either their face or him trying to blink through their curls in his eyes.  it's like impossible to keep them from being all up in his grill.  he is so patient and most of the time seems to honestly not mind.

That's my boy.  That one right there.  I love my boy.  

(look at our other posts from the last few days by clicking 'older posts.'  i haven't blogged this frequently in years!)