This talk is what I needed right now and I have a feeling I will need it again someday.  I've had so many testimony building moments recently.  I know He is with me.  He reaches out to me constantly in such small ways.  I love my Heavenly Father and my Savior.  They always know what I need.

https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2014/04/fear-not-i-am-with-thee?lang=eng&media=audio#listen=audio

I was feeling very very very down the other day.  It was one of those days that I just felt like wouldn't get going, I felt bummed out by my appearance, and I was feeling SO indecisive about what Audrey and I should do for the day.  I hate when I get indecisive like that…it really makes the day hard for me. When Audrey took her first nap of the day I came into the bedroom and said a good long prayer.  I pray every day, but this one was different because it wasn't hurried like so many other times.  I felt like I was really talking to my Heavenly Father, telling Him my sorrows and insecurities.  It was so personal to me to feel that I could speak honestly about how I was feeling, without worries about what He would think of me.  Maybe that sounds silly, but you know when you really want someone to talk to who will really understand what you're going through?  And even when it's such a small, insignificant, and even silly thing to be so upset about, you know that they don't think you're silly at all.  Sometimes that person has been my mom, most times it's been Andrew.  And yesterday was a reminder that at all times that person can be Heavenly Father.  Most times I feel like the things I worry about and struggle with are nothing compared to what others go through.  But when I can remember that He doesn't think I'm silly or stupid even when I do, then I can always feel better.  That's how it turned out yesterday.  After praying, spending that real time with Heavenly Father, I was able to get up, shake off some of those insecurities, and get on with my day.  And even later in the day when some of those feelings were creeping up on me again He sent me another help- in the form of Andrew coming home early.  I love my God and my Savior.  They know us individually and they will never dismiss our problems no matter how small and silly they may seem.

I loved this video so much.  I saw it in the Relief Society Broadcast and watched it again today.  It happened, of course, to be right when I needed it.  I want to not forget about it, so I'm posting it here for future Hillary.  Every once in awhile I get on here and look through my posts from previous years.  I find so many reminders of things to be happy about.  So this is for you, Hillary, and for my daughters and sisters and friends.  As Mufasa says to Simba, "Remember who you are!"  And remember who God is- our loving Father.

Julia and I have always been really different in a lot of ways.  Our tastes, goals, styles- most of it is very very different.  I love Audrey Hepburn.  She loves Marilyn Monroe.  Those kinds of things.  But two things that we do have in common are that we love everything about being home and that we have testimonies of the church.  I can understand how she is feeling in my own Hillary way.  Recently, I found this video and it has comforted me.  So even though we are different, and even though Elder Holland is not her favorite speaker (another way we are different), I hope that some of his words and the words of this song might speak to her heart the way it has spoken to mine.  Maybe it won't comfort her in the same way at all, and that's okay.  I just wanted to share it and tell her that she is loved.

Rafe Hollister and Otis!!

One of the things I've always wanted is a compilation of all of my favorite songs and dances from old movies.  I've now realized that I can use my blog for it!!  So they will all be in one place, even if in different posts as I discover new ones I love.  My hope is to be able to get on here whenever I've had a bad day and find all my cheerer-uppers at my fingertips.  It's my medicine.  I know what you're thinking- THIS IS THE BEST IDEA YOU'VE EVER HAD HILLARY!  And I agree with you.

Yesterday as I rode my bike home in the pouring rain Gene Kelly was on my mind.  I still love and adore this weather far more than summer, but as I went I was wondering how uncomfortable good old Gene must've felt jumping and dancing around in a soaking wet suit in Singin' in the Rain.  I was wearing jeans and a pretty good jacket but just standing in the rain before getting on my bike was pretty miserable.  I don't know how he danced in it with a smile on his face the whole time.  Wet clothes are not fun to take off.  It's hard enough to get a wet swimsuit off, and that is considerably less fabric than Gene Kelly was wearing.  So props to him.


The reason Gene Kelly was on my mind was because my co-worker Kristina had brought the movie Singing in the Rain for the kids to watch.  The day before we had been sitting with the kids while they watched a bright colored, technology infused, seemingly witty Disney Channel show before nap time.  Kristina had turned to me and wondered aloud if they would even laugh at something as simple as the Make 'Em Laugh song.  When she put it on yesterday they were at first distracted by anything and everything else in the room.  But as soon as Fit As a Fiddle came on they were suddenly more interested.

As they watched the Singin' in the Rain number they were rolling!  They were amazed that he was actually being allowed to sing and dance in the rain, splash in puddles, and use his umbrella as a toy.


And then of course they loved loved LOVED Make 'Em Laugh!



It did my heart good to hear them all cracking up hysterically and being amazed at Donald O'Connor's flips and hits in the head.  Just goes to show that you don't always need bright neon colors or flashy 3D animation to entertain a kid.  All you need is a little silliness.  Later on we had everyone put their coats on and we went outside to sing and dance in the rain rather than having indoor recess.

Needless to say it was a good day even with the wet clothes.  Life's good with musicals.

 I love these two songs.
I dream about singing this next song to my babies someday.